I’m hiding in my classroom, it’s hard to explain… I came to Africa to teach. Yes, I have been teaching and yes, they have been learning. However, unfortunately they are not doing. This morning I was supposed to teach a class but there was some sort of “miscommunication” and now it’s not happening. We’ve lost so much time over miscommunications like this.
Since Naomi and I now have our morning free, we decided to work in various wards of the hospital. Naomi went to maternity and I rounded on our bus accident boy who was now in the ICU. He is doing a little better than expected but still not out of the woods yet. After ICU rounds I went up to the emergency room. I found a very emaciated man lying in a bed with a severe oxygen deficit. The oxygen machine was there but it was not on him. I turned on the machine and placed the mask over his face. I took his vital signs and listened to his chest with my stethoscope. He needs IV fluids and some laboratory studies.
The nurse finally came so I asked him what was wrong with the man but he didn’t understand. He gave the man some oral medication and some water which of course he promptly vomited back up. He showed severe wasting which was probably due to end stage HIV. I tried again to explain that the man needed fluids but both the doctor and nurse closed themselves into another room with a patient less sick.
Since Naomi and I now have our morning free, we decided to work in various wards of the hospital. Naomi went to maternity and I rounded on our bus accident boy who was now in the ICU. He is doing a little better than expected but still not out of the woods yet. After ICU rounds I went up to the emergency room. I found a very emaciated man lying in a bed with a severe oxygen deficit. The oxygen machine was there but it was not on him. I turned on the machine and placed the mask over his face. I took his vital signs and listened to his chest with my stethoscope. He needs IV fluids and some laboratory studies.
The nurse finally came so I asked him what was wrong with the man but he didn’t understand. He gave the man some oral medication and some water which of course he promptly vomited back up. He showed severe wasting which was probably due to end stage HIV. I tried again to explain that the man needed fluids but both the doctor and nurse closed themselves into another room with a patient less sick.
I would have started doing all the tasks myself if I thought I could find the supplies. But in reality what is it going to do? Is it worse for me who knows what to do to be in inactive, to not do those things out of fear and/or frustration and not wanting to make trouble for my hosts? Should I be trying harder to communicate? Do I need to be more aggressive.
Here, I am a consultant. But I am one who likes and needs to consult and debrief with others. It’s not very easy to do here. Sometimes I wonder if it’s even OK to do this. Should I be ashamed for thinking these thoughts? Am I displaying “ineffective individual coping” for needing to discuss this? Am I worth less as a teacher, a nurse, or a “missionary” if I can’t make taking action a part of my teaching? So… I hide in my empty classroom feeling like an imposture.
Don’t worry I know that this is all part of growing and learning how God use us even when we .feel our efforts are futile. ;)
Here, I am a consultant. But I am one who likes and needs to consult and debrief with others. It’s not very easy to do here. Sometimes I wonder if it’s even OK to do this. Should I be ashamed for thinking these thoughts? Am I displaying “ineffective individual coping” for needing to discuss this? Am I worth less as a teacher, a nurse, or a “missionary” if I can’t make taking action a part of my teaching? So… I hide in my empty classroom feeling like an imposture.
Don’t worry I know that this is all part of growing and learning how God use us even when we .feel our efforts are futile. ;)
